Online dating can be exciting and nerve-wracking at the same time, especially when someone you like sends you that coveted “like” or “match” notification. But what happens next? The first message after he liked you on a dating app is critical because it can set the tone for your conversation and potentially lead to something more. Many people struggle with figuring out exactly what to say, and it’s perfectly normal to feel a bit anxious.
This post will guide you through the best ways to craft that first message after he liked you on a dating app, offering tips, ideas, and examples to help you stand out, keep things light, and make a great first impression.
Why the First Message Matters
Your first message is the icebreaker. It’s your chance to catch his attention and start a conversation that could lead to a deeper connection. A great opening message can also ease any initial awkwardness and show that you’re interested without coming on too strong.
In this digital age, where people receive tons of notifications and matches, a boring or generic first message can get lost in the shuffle. So, it’s important to be thoughtful and engaging when you send that first message.
Best Strategies for Crafting the Perfect First Message
When crafting your first message after he liked you on a dating app, there are a few strategies you can follow to ensure you’re being authentic, funny, and interesting. Here’s what you can do:
1. Make It Personal
One of the easiest ways to start a conversation is by commenting on something from his profile. Did he mention a favorite hobby, book, or travel destination? Use that as a jumping-off point for your first message. This shows that you took the time to read his profile, which can be flattering.
For example:
- “Hey! I noticed you’re into hiking. What’s the best trail you’ve ever been on?”
- “I saw you’re a Harry Potter fan too. Which house do you think you’d be sorted into?”
2. Use Humor
Humor is a great way to break the ice and make the conversation fun right from the start. A playful, light-hearted message can show your personality and make him smile, which is always a good start.
Example:
- “So, what’s the most embarrassing thing you’ve ever done on a date? I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours!”
3. Ask an Open-Ended Question
Avoid yes/no questions as they can lead to a dead-end conversation. Instead, ask open-ended questions that invite a more detailed response. This keeps the conversation flowing and allows both of you to get to know each other better.
For instance:
- “If you could travel anywhere in the world tomorrow, where would you go and why?”
- “What’s one thing you’re passionate about that not many people know?”
4. Be Genuine and Positive
While trying to be witty and creative, don’t lose sight of being genuine. Sometimes, a simple, honest compliment can go a long way. Just make sure it’s thoughtful and not overly gushy.
Example:
- “Hey! I really like your smile in your photos—it’s contagious!”
- “You seem like someone who’s really passionate about life. I’d love to hear more about that!”
5. Mention Something You Have in Common
If you share a common interest or background, highlight it! Shared interests can create an instant connection and provide a natural topic for conversation.
Example:
- “I see you’re a big coffee lover—do you have a favorite local café?”
- “You’re into basketball too? Who’s your favorite team?”
What Not to Say in Your First Message
While it’s important to make your first message interesting and personal, there are also some things you should avoid:
- Avoid Overly Generic Messages: A message like “Hey” or “What’s up?” can come across as lazy. You want to show that you’ve put some thought into your message.
- Don’t Be Overly Flirty: Being flirty is fine, but don’t go overboard right away. Save the more playful banter for later in the conversation when you’ve established some rapport.
- Steer Clear of Negativity: Avoid complaints or negative comments in your first message. Keep things upbeat and positive to set the right tone.
Examples of Great First Messages
Here are some more examples of good first messages to send after he liked you on a dating app:
- “I see we both love dogs! What’s the name of your pup?”
- “You mentioned you’re into cooking. What’s the best dish you make? I might need some recipes!”
- “I’m curious—what’s the most interesting place you’ve ever traveled to?”
- “I noticed you’re into live music. Have you been to any great concerts lately?”
Each of these messages shows that you’ve read his profile, are interested in him as a person, and are inviting a fun, meaningful conversation.
Conclusion: Setting the Right Tone from the Start
The first message after he liked me dating app you on a dating app doesn’t need to be complicated. The key is to be genuine, light-hearted, and interested in getting to know him. By following the tips above and avoiding common pitfalls, you can confidently start a conversation that feels natural and enjoyable for both of you.
Remember, the goal is to keep things fun and easy-going, which will make it more likely that your connection grows and turns into something meaningful. So go ahead, send that first message, and see where it leads!
FAQs
1. What should I avoid in my first message after he liked me on a dating app? Avoid overly generic messages like “Hey” or “What’s up?” Also, steer clear of overly flirty or negative comments. Keep things light, positive, and thoughtful.
2. How long should my first message be? Your first message doesn’t have to be lengthy. A couple of sentences are enough, as long as they’re interesting and give him something to respond to.
3. Can I ask about his job in the first message? It’s okay to ask about his job, but make sure it’s done in a casual and non-intrusive way. For example, “I see you work in tech—what kind of projects are you working on these days?”
4. Should I wait for him to message me first? Not necessarily! If you feel like reaching out, go for it. Many guys appreciate a confident woman who starts the conversation.
5. How do I keep the conversation going after the first message? Follow up on his response with another question or comment that shows you’re engaged in the conversation. Keep asking open-ended questions to keep things flowing.
